Off With Their Heads

Of course nothing is perfect. It's a pretty fairytale dream that we hold, especially us little girls, that we'll find our Prince (or Princess) and we'll be whisked away to a beautiful castle with maids and servants and we'll wear pretty dresses and be perfectly beautiful and never have to work ever. That might be perfect. But we find a way to create perfection with the hand of cards we are dealt. Life is just that; a game. Always trying to get ahead while dealing with certain obstacles that are uncontrollable and handed to you on a tarnished, used-to-be silver platter.

Just as everything is falling together more things are falling apart. My unemployment claim form got "lost". So instead of cool places where you can do shit online California has got to be the slowest state to catch up to technology in more than one place. They have to mail me a new claim form, and at that time it may be delayed because I quit my job. I quit because my checks were bouncing and we worked for a felon who was stealing money from his clients. So I had every reason to quit but unemployment has to go through all their red fucking tape in an attempt to strangle us before we can ever get ahead.

We both just want out of Florida. There's nothing holding us here besides the potential malaria from the millions of bugs who inhabit this state. And even if that happened the medical community won't touch us because we have no insurance. My support is in California, my family is in California, and her family isn't that far away either. I wish we could just pack up and GO but we don't really even have the gas money to do so! So we wait....

Things for the wedding are coming along. But with the economy the way it is it doesn't look like all of Adrian's "special humans" will be there to stand next to her at the wedding. Which is sad for both of us. For her because these people mean so much to her and she really wanted them there. Me because I'd like to meet these important influential people. But we have an idea. Initially we were going to stop in Arizona to see my brother and Las Vegas to see her mom. That was going to be an extra 3-4 days of "hanging out" added to the already 4-5 days of driving. Instead we're contemplating going through Michigan and having a Pre Wedding Party! This way her friends get to see her and we can all spend one night together and it doesn't really interfere with our time line to get home. The best of both worlds.

So the first leg of our trip will be from Tampa, FL to Detroit, MI. I'd like to stop in Jacksonville to see my Aunt Penny/Godmother who I haven't seen since I was three. A simple dinner and we'll be back on our way.


Rand McNally tells me the trip is 18 hours and 55 minutes.

The second, very long, leg of our trip will bring us home. Although at this point we are staying with my mom for a few weeks while we get housing and jobs in order. But we'll be less than 2 hours from Sacramento which is much better than 4 days or a 12 hour flight!

34 hours and 35 minutes. That's nothing!

So all told about 4 days worth of driving. Not too bad for a cross country trip. If we start late one night we can stay with my Aunt in Jacksonville. Get up early and if we can both do an ass load of driving be in Detroit the same day. Although I feel we'll probably stop once along the way. Three to four stops from Detroit to The East Bay and we'll be good and home.

We had initially thought of getting a U-Haul for the trip. Nothing better for the lesbians right?? Throw a hitch on the car and we're ready to go. But my ever brilliant mother told us to check on Craigslist for a trailer for the car. Pay $100-$200 here to buy it. Then we don't worry about damage, paying for extra days of rental, etc. And when we get back we turn around and sell it for what we bought it for. Worst case we loose a little in the sale. Still saves us $400 from U-Haul.

So we're cutting money everywhere. If one or two things could just fall into line here we could easily be on our way end of May/beginning of June. Which puts us hopefully into a home by end of June and we're good to go. Settle in, settle down, and get married. Crazy time wise but we've already changed the wedding date twice and neither of us really wants to push it back. Although if the worst case scenario happened we would. But we're not hoping for the worst at this point.

So today I'm looking for boxes on Craigslist. I want to start packing things we never use. CD's, toys, shelving we don't need right now. That way when everything gently falls into place I won't be running around like the White Rabbit yelling "WE'RE LATE WE'RE LATE." I'll probably look at trailers too cause if we find one for the right price why not just get it now?

So cross your fingers the Red Queen doesn't get in our way. We're headed to a tea party with Mad Hatters and field mice and I just can't wait to sink my teeth into some crumpets.

Wonderland here we come.