Every once in a while I look at something or think about something that kinda tugs at my heart strings. This happened tonight.
I was looking at my best friends birthday party invitation for her 30th birthday. And I began to realize how much I've missed over the last year:
Erinn's Birthday and subsequent party
Howie going 100% digital
Holidays with family and friends.... numerous Second Saturday walks, BBQ's, days at the river... all of it.
I see posts on Facebook and I long to throw on my bathing suit and drive out to the river. I see the plans of an "epic evening" and know I'd give anything to be in California 3 days from now... but I know that will never happen. I have to roll with the punches and see where life takes me.
Of course missing things comes with gaining things as well. I have a love, a fiancee, a new home (to move into soon) and a wedding to plan. I have new babies and while I can't imagine my life without any of these things sometimes I wish I hadn't missed so much.
These are nights and times and memories that I'll never get back. Of course I'll make new memories on new nights. But that doesn't make the "missing" of the things I missed any less hard to bare.
I'll be home soon.